Battle of the Front Door

My War on Ants escalated yesterday as the Battle of the Front Door commenced because the fuckers tried to outflank me.

You see, I’ve already won two battles:

  1. Battle of the Kitchen Sink – no ants for at least three days now.
  2. Battle of the Refrigerator – almost no activity on the floor in front of the refrigerator at the present.

And I’ve got the ants retreating in the Battle of the Back Door – very little movement.

But yesterday, the fuckers moved their point of attack all the way around the house to the front door. So I established a two-stage defensive/offensive operation.

war on ants image

  • Defense – Placed three beer caps filled with baitthree parts Domino sugar and one part 20 Mule Team borax – to seal the perimeter at the threshold to the front door.
  • Offense – Placed a small plastic plate filled with bait on the porch floor – approximately one foot in front of the threshold – to ambush the fuckers before they reach the front door.

war on ants image

During the overnight – The three beer caps attracted the leading edge of the ants. There’s still some traffic – but much less than yesterday. And the plastic plate seems to be working perfectly. And as you can see, an abundance of ants have been diverted to the plate before reaching the front door – to partake of the poison and transport it back to HQ for sharing purposes.

Now I’m trying to figure out where they might strike next.

Plus, I’m maintaining my defenses in the kitchen sink, in front of the refrigerator, and on the back deck – in case they try to return to those areas.

I’ll keep you abreast . . .

In addition to being the official Eagles Outsider for BlameMyFather.com, Barry Bowe is also the author of:

Written by Barry Bowe
Former sportswriter - first to put Timmy Duncan's name on the sports page.